Hi Sheila, you are not butting in....the more the merrier.
Sea legs not necessary....Jean doesn't have them.

The parrot definitely will come in handy and as for the rum....well, lets just say it's very welcome but for goodness sake don't let Kathleen or Eleanor see it.

As for the initiation ceremony, I am not sure, we will have to confer on this.........no, decided it's not needed. All you need is to be as daft as we are

Anyone else up for it while we are recruiting?

Great to have you aboard, Sheila. I loved it when you said you didn't have a clue what was going on - YOU'LL FIT IN BRILLIANTLY. No one has a clue what's going on, so you are in exceptional company!!!
You are now the official gun firer!

Dor? What are you doing with me pirate and cutlass? He was a special gift from Budgy and I am looking after him 'til I reach the ship. Now I have the grand ole cutlass I have temporarily given up my scissors as I feel the cutlass will be so much more useful when we sail on the Caribbean ... ... Thames? Thames?? Did someone say River Thames? As in London River Thames? Well, when are we going to the Caribbean? Will that be after the training session? I am so excited ... all those hunky pirates of the Caribbean

Kathleen will make a good Admiral but I do hope it's not going to be early morning exercises on the deck. You know what she was like as PE teacher! I love all the ideas that are coming through though and everyone seems very busy with their jobs. As I haven't been allocated a 'special' job and as I'm not bringing my scissors this time (although I could trim some rather nice bunting??) could I please help Sheila with the 21 gun salute? I am having counting lessons and I'm sure by the time we set sail I'll be up to 21 1,2,3,7,9,45,22,67,14, no not there yet 'shakes head sadly' and 'keeps trying' 1,2,3,4, 11,20,37, hmmm.... If I stay off Eleanor's cake until we have fired the cannons all will be well

Ship ahoy, swish, swish oops

OK ladies. We all know by now that Sheila and cannons and gunpowder do not make natural bedfellows. We somehow have to stop Lyn "helping out". Heaven only knows what would happen if they were both let loose on the guns at the same time. Sheila has now apologised to HMQ for painting the cannons in an array of pretty pastel shades and jamming up the firing mechanism. We are just about to shove Dor inside them to try and release whatever is gunged up. Sheila has also made a lengthy apology to the Archbish who was in the midst of Eucharist when a stray cannon ball bounced through the open Abbey doors and blew him and the rest of the clergy sky high. The fire brigade came eventually and brought them down safely from the rafters. The Sacristan landed in one of the trees and and was so traumatised he now thinks he is a bird. He is refusing to come down and squwarking and flapping his arms like a mad man.

Sheila - Eleanor's cooking is sublime. Once you have had a couple of slices of her special cake, you really won't notice WHAT you are eating.

A little bird has told me that our intrepid Dor is off on a Canadian adventure later this year, so we must be ready to transport her out there. She is going to attempt to be the first woman with RA to tightrope in her wellies across the Niagara Falls. We must be there to witness what will surely be a complete spectacle.

As Lyn can't count yet, please, please let's keep her away from both Sheila and the guns.

I do apologise for painting the cannons but they were such a dull, grey colour. In fact, Julie could knit bunting in contrasting colours to hang across them. We could place fairy lights behind them to help us see where we are going when it gets dark. I do love colour! By the way Jean I hope you've asked Davy Jones if there's room in his locker for my ballgown. You never know when you might need one and I think Julie has enough knitting to do for now.

'Hats' off to Kathleen. She certainly has got everyone sussed out. Have we got a Logistics Officer? Kathleen could have a dual role.

Oh Jean! I don't know about Doreen walking a tightrope yet, she hasn't had much practise. Maybe, we could help by letting her walk the plank a few times just to get used to it. She won't mind getting wet, (remember Trafalgar Square?) in fact it might be useful because she will get very, very wet when she falls into Niagara Falls. I could practise firing Julie's knitted rope ladder down to save her. Don't worry about Lyn I can get her to count the rungs to keep her occupied. By the time she gets up to 20 we will have rescued Doren fom the depths of the deep!!

I hope you have saved me some cake Eleanor I am so looking forward to trying it. I might bring a bit home for Captain Flint (he's driving me nuts practising his lines. He's not got much further than Lyn yet.)

Sorry about the confusion Doreen. You can borrow my waterwings if you like. You might be able to fly drive if you get bored half way down. Incidentally, did I say Kathleen could be Logistics Officer? silly me..I meant to say Biscuits Officer!

Has everyone gone on shore leave????

Sheila x

Well girls, I was so proud of the pole dancing at Zara's send off but feel that the act will need a bit more polish before the London Palladium for the winter season. Did I metion that I had got us the booking? Well, was chatting to Brucie at the palace who suggested that we might like to join him on stage when he resurrects 'Sunday Night At.....' I off course accepted on your behalf but did explain that we had a cruise down the Thames in mind now that we have bought the Arc Royal. Incidently, did anyone else think that we would get it so cheaply? Did expect to pay more than 19 shillings and 6 pence. Anyhow, Brucie would like to join us and will bring along Jimmy T when I said that we had a golf course on board.

Julie, I did promise that you would knit them man size sailor suits? Hope that you will have time before we leave. Can I suggest that you allow the uniformed officers to get back to work so that you can start knitting.

As for that snake! Oh no, not again!!!! Parrots on board is expected and seems gentile but that darned snake!

Sheila, I don't know about michelin stars but you will be seeing them after my special cake. Have been shopping already for the ingredients and bought some bulbs when there.

Kathleen in charge of biscuits! We may regret that decision! Has Lyn returned from her 'stop cutting' course? Please be to goodness that she has been cured.

We are sailing!!!!!!!

How many of us are going to Edinburgh to see Zara get hitched then?

Eleanor, it will be a very good excuse to get our tartan outfits out. Can you get a replacement tam o` shanter, or will we get Julie to knit you one?

Sheila, was that really you in the Tornado? Did you get to press any of the buttons? I only ask because instead of the vapour trails being the normal red, white and blue the one you were in was trailing very fetching orange and green. I sensed youd had a hand in that - I expect the poor pilot will be up on a charge.

Doreen really excelled herself at Prince P`s party, didn`t she? She kept showing him her new Flyflots and asking what he thought of them.Then of course she attempted a pirouette in them - falling on top of one of the corgis was not amusing at all.

London Palladium eh? Sounds good to me - we shall have to think up some new sequences. Jean, I hope you`ve got some new moves to teach us.

Please please don't let Eleanor wear that dreadful tam o shanter again. Maybe we could ask Lyn to trim it up a bit first?